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How to Disinvite Your Wedding Guests

Bells Will be Ringing, But You’re Not Invited

Couples around the world who dream of the perfect wedding are now forced into difficult decisions.  Because COVID-19 limits travel, closes wedding venues, and creates health concerns over large gatherings, many to-be’s have decided not to be for the moment. While some couples chose to postpone their nuptials, others decide to move forward with small ceremonies. This creates one particularly sticky problem. Invitations sent pre-COVID now have couples faced with the odious task of having to uninvite wedding guests to their smaller celebrations.

Intrigue is here to help you uninvited wedding guests this without causing offense!

Nobody wants to be on the cut list, but during a pandemic that continues to spread and threaten lives, people are likely to understand a couple’s need to create a small and safe celebration. In fact, there will be those who can not, or are unwilling to attend due to virus concerns.

That’s why your first step should be to check with the core wedding group (family, wedding party members) to see what their reaction is to a more intimate ceremony.  You may find that some are immunocompromised or can not travel due to restrictions. Some may simply be unwilling to take the risk.

Once You Make Initial Cuts..

The time has come to establish some sort of rule for cutting, such as family only.  To avoid hard feelings, the last thing you want is to make your decision seem arbitrary.  You might even consider a virtual option whereby disinvited guests are asked to participate via digital access.

When you decide on numbers and who you are cutting from the list, it is important to make personal connections with those you are uninviting.  A phone call is the best way to chat personally and explain your situation.  If not, then the best etiquette is to send a personalized card.

The message you convey will also go a long way toward saving hurt feelings. Begin by emphasizing how difficult your decision is and that it is made absolutely out of concern for the health of all involved.  A nice way to make the ex-guest feel important is to tell them there will be a full celebration at a later (post-COVID) date where you will be eager to see them.  Or, if a party is already part of your smaller plans, you might suggest that you would like to get together with them later one-on-one.

Finally, When the Wedding Day Arrives..

Consider what you put on social media.  Posts that include photos of attendees who are part of a group to which some of the uninvited belong are bound to generate ill-will.  For now, it might be best to stick to shots of the happy couple and maybe the wedding participants.

If you are on the receiving end of wedding guests disinvite, try not to take it personally.  COVID-19 is a serious threat and cutting a hundred person guest list down to a handful is no easy thing.  You were important enough to be invited and important enough for the couple to consider your health. And, yes, you should send a wedding gift even if you are uninvited.  It does not have to be the full Reed and Barton silver place setting you had considered.  Maybe something more modest.  Maybe a lovely pair of toasting flutes or an alloy wine chiller; something that says, “I understand.”

Written by, Megan Glenn

Charleston Bridal Suite at The Faber House

Faber Bridal Suite

The destination wedding dream for many newly engaged couples often includes historic streets, sandy beaches, and southern hospitality. Many come to fall in love with the traditional homes or unconventional settings to host the big day. This is why we wanted to create a beautiful bridal suite that represents all of what Charleston has to offer.

Intrigue is so excited to share our amazing bridal suite with all of the couples choosing Charleston as their wedding destination.  We have over 1200sqft of space that includes a private bridal dressing room, full kitchen, traditional Charleston Piazza, full furnished bridal suite, 52″ flat-screen TV, a beautiful outside courtyard, and much much more!

Our Charleston Bridal Suite has a full kitchen so have fun creating your own catering menu for your special day. If you don’t want to worry about the details reach out to our friends over at Caviar & Bananas and select one of their bridal menus.

In reality, Charleston may not be your home, but we will make sure the Faber Bridal House feels like that on your special day. Above all, you and your bridal party will want to savor every moment together and experience a wedding weekend to remember.

Our couples have the option of bringing in their own stylist or working with the amazing team at Silhouette on Site.

Located in the heart of Charleston at

635 East Bay Street

Charleston, SC

Why choose a hotel when you can have the full Charleston experience. 

 

Guide to Hiring a Destination Wedding Planner

Intrigue offers full-service destination wedding planning and design! Read and learn more about our years of destination wedding planning experience. Additionally, our complete guide to the befits of utilizing a destination wedding planner!

There is something special about getting married in the destination where your partner proposed. Whether against a backdrop of mountains or in the sand on a tropical getaway, the magic is there. As gorgeous as these locations are, do not forget the legwork that goes into planning a destination wedding. After all, there is more to take into account than the venue and location itself. Timing of your ceremony, the weather, and guest availability to travel are all concerns when destination wedding planning. But with a little help, you can plan memorable nuptials for you, your spouse, and your guests. Follow these tips to help you find the perfect destination wedding planner and pull off a destination wedding to remember.

It may come as no surprise that destination weddings require more coordination than staying close to home. Besides, paying attention to detail is crucial. Not only are you planning an event from a distance, but you are likely hosting multiple events over the course of the wedding weekend. Instead, there is the potential of developing weekend itineraries, not just your wedding ceremony and reception. The good news is, destination wedding planners like Intrigue can help you with just that.

Intrigue Design and Events Destination Wedding Planner Destination Wedding Planning imageIn addition to the comfort of knowing your wedding is in capable hands, destination wedding planners are here to ensure you have your dream wedding!

Set Your Mind at Ease 

Destination wedding planners ease your stress by answering difficult questions and providing solutions.  Regardless, we layout facts, and offer an unbiased, professional opinion. Planners are an invaluable asset when making hard decisions like rain contingency plans, postponing, or handling unwarranted surprises.

Expertise Where it Counts

Top destination wedding planners like Intrigue Design and Event, have years of experience, connections, and relationships. We handle every problem that arises with grace.

Locals Welcome

Select a planner who is familiar with your destination or has excellent resources there. Experience-based insight is not always available, by simply searching online. In addition to knowing the best vendors to work with and suggesting the months for optimal weather, we recommend hidden gem locations to visit and eat.

Intrigue Design and Events Why Destination Planners are Valuable

In addition to traditional wedding planning duties, here is a list of common tasks we are responsible for:

 
  • Provide guidance based on knowledge and local research on laws, permits needed, marriage license requirements, etc.
  • Offer you select vendors and a venue best suited to your guest count, budget, and vision.
  • Help produce a realistic budget based on your needs and desires.
  • Offer travel guidance and advice to help you and your guests plan the trip with confidence.
  • Create contingency plans for rain and other unforeseen road bumps.
  • Coordinate with vendors and the venue, timeline management, and family management.
  • Manage RSVPs and guestlists.
  • Catering negotiation, communication, and management.

If you are not sure where to begin your search, here are helpful tips our team recommends!

 

Venue Insight

If you have your eye on a specific venue in your desired destination, ask them who their favorite destination wedding planners are. Ask questions pertaining to customer service, vendor management, organization, and professionalism.

 

Slide Into Their DMs

We know you save wedding inspiration pictures and now is the time to use them! Look to find the original designer, their location, and if they specialize in destination wedding planning.  Search hashtags, locations, and vendors located in your desired destination. Searching for wedding photographers on social media for your destination is a great resource to find like-minded planners.

 

True Testimonials

Read true testimonials from couples on platforms such as The KnotWedding Wire, or Google,  After reading, you will feel confident you can connect with your destination wedding planner and start to build trust.

 

Time For a Chat

Have an open conversation with your planner about your wedding day vision. Be completely transparent about expectations, and budget goals. You want a planner and team who mediate and solve problems on-the-spot. Additionally, those that make your aesthetic dreams come true. Ask about executed weddings and events. In fact, ask about when things went wrong and how a solution was reached.  Also, inquire about memorable wedding moments to get a feel for why we love what we do.

Anticipate Incurring Expenses

This includes transportation and lodging. If not station at the location, your destination planner will fly in a few days before to meet with your venue and vendors in advance. In some instances, location scouting may be necessary for the initial destination wedding planning process. Ask your planner to review these costs prior to receiving a proposal and signing a contract.

 

Utilize Modern-Day Technology

Some clients feel more comfortable traveling to their destination wedding location to tour potential venues. But it is not necessarily required. If flying out to your destination is not within budget or schedule, your planner can schedule a video chat with you and your vendors. By utilizing Facetime, Zoom, Skype, or any other realtime streaming platform, we virtually walk the venue space with you.